You owe it to yourself to delight in your own magnificence!
“Whoa,” you say. “That’s a strong statement–maybe even a bit lofty!” Well, thinking like that is probably not working for you, I’ll bet!
So, how IS your self esteem? Okay, let’s back up a minute.
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Questions to determine your self esteem
Read the questions below and answer them HONESTLY:
1- How many times a day does someone pay you a compliment?
2- How often does anyone do something kind for you unsolicited?
3- How often do you receive positive, encouraging feedback for your efforts?
4- How often does anyone express their undying gratitude for the many unselfish acts you perform daily?
5- When was the last time someone gave you a gift just because they love you?
6- Does anyone ever look in you in the eyes and tell you they adore you unconditionally?
7- Is there anyone in your life that would jump for joy if you decided to go on a week-long adventure….alone?
Now, let’s check your answers to my ‘self-esteem’ questionnaire!
a) Did your answers…give you a warm fuzzy feeling or make you stand taller? If so, I suggest you turn off your computer and immediately seek out those individuals and thank them for contributing to your positive self-esteem and ask them to promise never to change so you can coast through life knowing you are important.
OR
b) Did your answers…stir up some anger, sadness, or shock?
Well, CONGRATULATIONS, you have just experienced a breakthrough – one that will put you on the road to a higher
quality of life forever!!!
BE GRATEFUL FOR THESE INSIGHTS TO A MUCH GREATER SELF ESTEEM
One you can count on!
Insight #1- It is not anyone else’s job or responsibility to validate your existence!
Insight #2- It is not up to anyone else to provide you with reasons why you are terrific and deserve a beautiful life experience!
*If all those people who kept pumping you with ‘happy air’ flew away, you would be deflated. Then, what? No self-esteem!*
SELF ESTEEM – TO HOLD ONE SELF IN HIGH REGARD…TO BE HELD IN HIGH REGARD BY ONE SELF
Hmmmmm!
You don’t NEED anyone else’s input (not saying it doesn’t sound good sometimes, it’s just not required)!
You can be…you must be your own pump!
Questions revisited
HOW? Let’s take another look at those ‘nasty’ questions and I’ll show you!
1- Compliments? Who better than you knows every single wonderful thing you do each day that is worth recognition…pay yourself a compliment!
2- Kindnesses? Be kind to yourself – say ‘no’ to others once in a while, take 10 to refresh and nourish YOU – walk outside, listen to some tunes, get a short chapter in!
3- Feedback? Kudos and constructive criticism always has more power when it comes from within. Go ahead and pat yourself on the back!
4- Gratitude? Practice noticing little ways you contribute to a better world: smiling at the harsh bank teller, pushing the rock on the sidewalk off to the side so no one trips, parking further away from the store in case someone has trouble walking – it all counts! Be grateful to yourself!
5- Gift? Not all presents cost money and certainly do not have to come from others. Take time for a hot bath, keep that golf date every Saturday morning or make time for your favorite hobby. Treat yourself!
6- Unconditional love? Look at yourself up close in the mirror at least twice a day, smile a huge smile and say, “I love you, man…you are so cool!”
7- Adventure? When you do finally recognize that you are spectacular and ever-growing…acknowledge that “knowing” by finding small or large ways to discover for yourself what a miracle you truly are!
Get lost in a good book, try something you’ve never done, meditate or take a trip!
Hey, look…you found your self esteem
Was it the last place you thought of looking?
What a treasure you’ve discovered
You owe it to yourself to delight in your own magnificence !!!
This article is free for republishing
Judi has been helping others create a positive difference in their own lives for her entire career.
Who Is Deciding How You React To Your Feelings?
Emotions are powerful things. Do you realise that almost 90% of your actions are driven by your automatic emotional responses to external and internal stimuli?
Almost everything you do is driven by an emotion. Most of the time this is not a problem, however, sometimes are reactions are not how we would like them to be.
Often we react to situations, people, events etc., rather than responding to them!
Are your current and most profound emotions automatic reactions or purposeful responses?
Are your actions driven by purposeful thoughts or are your thoughts driven by emotional reactions?
Are you frustrated with how you continue to react the same way every time a specific situation or feeling comes up?
This is very common.
It is especially true of anger, stress and anxiety!
Our emotional reactions can be so out of control that they can endanger our career, relationships and even our own lives and the lives of others.
There are two ways to deal with emotional reactions that have become a automatic behavioral pattern in our lives.
The first is to change how we respond to the feelings that surface in our consciousness.
This is just a choice you make. When you choose to respond to your feelings instead of reacting to them you empower yourself to take different actions; you take yourself off automatic!
To do this you must change your perception of the emotions that you are feeling. Perception plays a major role in our thoughts and actions.
Perception is based on internal beliefs that have become engrained and programmed into the subconscious mind.
For example, do you get uncontrollably angry?
Ask yourself why.
Boilerplate responses not allowed
Now do not accept the usual response that such-and-such happened and it made you angry or so-and-so said or did this-and-that which made you angry.
The truth is you made yourself angry because you perceived the situation in a certain way!
Did you feel that the other person was trying to belittle you or steal your power?
Did you feel a loss of control?
Find the motivating emotion! Find it now. Bring to mind a time when you had an automatic reaction that was angry (we all have them).
How did you feel?
I bet you felt threatened in some way.
Start questioning your reasoning for believing what you believe about that situation. Is it possible, just possible, that there may be an alternative reason?
Choose now to respond to those feelings differently by questioning their validity instead of merely reacting to them!
This approach is highly effective but does take concentrated effort and is often better practiced by recalling previous events and forming the habit of questioning using those events.
Trying this approach at the time of an emotional outburst is difficult if you have not previously created the habit of doing it!
The second way to eliminate emotional reactions is to “release” the emotion itself.
It is possible to completely eliminate emotional responses altogether.
Would you like to remove the feelings that are causing you to react and act in ways that you do not like?
Then try the sample process for doing this described in the video on the Sedona Method review page!